It's never too late to change, even for old dogs like me! I just figured out a way to make life more pleasant for myself. It has everything to do with self-talk and questioning arbitrary definitions.
Have you ever tracked how much of your time is spent on activities our culture defines as getting there vs. being there? Cooking is getting there, eating is being there. Writing is getting there, publishing is being there. Dating is getting there, marriage is being there. Commuting is getting there, working is being there.
Using this cultural categorization, "getting
there" is by far the largest category of my time usage. But recently it occurred to me that the distinction between getting there and being there was arbitrary and maybe I could just eliminate it for myself. Then I'd just be doing whatever I'm doing -- no comparison or evaluation or measurement of progress toward a destination would be necessary.
Allow me to illustrate with a real world example from my kitchen: I'm baking, and I realize I'll need a bowl that is nested inside other bowls. The un-nesting process used to annoy me, and I would rush through it feeling aggravated about the delay and extra work. I was not amused by anything that prolonged the getting there process. I wanted to be there, enjoying the smell of brownies wafting through the house.